LAST TIME: There was an explosion at the Raft, and Daredevil, Spider-Woman, Luke Cage, and Foggy are trapped inside, while outside Captain America is preparing an offensive against the escaped convicts, and Spider-Man shows up to get out of watching a romantic comedy. Yep, that’s his only motivation to be involved. Oh also the Sentry is there. Good for him.
Page 1, Panel 1: Um, comic? Have we started? Can you wait until I have my pants on at least?
Page 1, Panel 4: Spider-Man feels guilty enough about putting others in harm’s way that he’s just going to breeze past the highly trained and armed S.H.I.E.L.D. agents. This should go well.
Page 3, Panel 1: Hey you guys!
Page 3, Panel 5: Should I know who this guy is or why he’s throwing (?) Spider-Man into the pile of convicts? I know I have his name and occupation, but I have never heard of this guy before.
Page 4, Panel 1: One of this guys thinks Christmas is when all the lights go out, you’re let out of your room, and a dude in a red suit falls on you.
Page 4, Panel 3: The shit? That random guy with the spooky face just snapped Spidey’s wrist!
Page 5, Panel 2: Ryan Reynolds refuses to leave his room after the embarrassment that was Green Lantern.
Page 5, Panel 3: I thought using my highly toxic powers to provide some light would be easier than just bringing a goddamn flashlight.
Page 6, Panel 1: Luke Cage cares more about his shirt than the immediate threat to his life. Badass.
Page 6, Panel 2: Okay, I’m pretty sure every villain is not a foulmouthed asshole. Spider-Skank? That’s just rude.
Page 7, Panel 2: Ah, some soldiers just showed up to distract Carnage!
Page 7, Panel 3: And now they’ve disappeared again. Where did those guys even come from?
Page 9, Panel 6: I hope you like seeing Spider-Man getting punched in the face by bad guys so inconsequential that they need to provide their names. Who the hell is Foolkiller and why should I care?
Page 10, Panel 2: Yeah, Cap, where the hell were you? He was like ten feet away from you.
Page 12, Panel 5: 87? That’s it? Because it seems like there are lot more people. I mean, if they are throwing no-names like Foolkiller in here…
Page 13, Panel 1: Sentry, sir, you should really reconsider that belt.
Page 14, Panel 1-8: Oh this again. The same panel repeated over and over again like I’m supposed to understand what that even means. It’s just a single strip of gradient light and the word Booom. What does that signify?
Page 14, Panel 10: It was apparently somebody flying.
Page 15, Panel 3: Oh okay, Sentry is carrying Carnage into space…
Page 15, Panel 4: …so he can rip him in half. The most powerful being on Earth-616, ladies and gentlemen!
Page 16, Panel 1: And then Luke Cage does and yells something incomprehensible. Fantastic.
Page 16, Panel 2: Spider-Woman can fly? Does she just manifest powers at random?
Page 17, Panel 4: Just noticed, why isn’t Jessica Drew wearing any pants? Why did she wear a flirty business skirt on her trip to the bottom of a superpowered prison? She knew there was a chance she’d have to fight.
Page 17, Panel 6: A reaction shot to a blast of water, but no reaction to the Sentry tearing through the exact same hole?
Page 18, Panel 1: How did Daredevil and Luke Cage get up here? Isn’t this fight happening a good 60 feet above the level they were on? That’s why Spider-Woman had to fly up, right?
Page 18, Panel 2: Bitch bitch bitch, Spider-Man. Why would anyone blame you for this prison break?
Page 19, Panel 6: That’s…not a panel. It conveys no action, it portrays nothing that makes any sense, and it looks like it was cut in half at the page. What the heck is going on? And why said “Hey, Steve” earlier? They just kind of ignored that.
Page 20, Panel 1: Oh, it was Iron Man. The balloon was just pointed towards the wrong place in time, and the scene that actually showed him showing up was missing. What a mess.
Page 20, Panel 2: Guys! Guys! Prison break! No time for idle chitchat. I don’t care if you’re friends.
Page 21, Panel 1: Sure thing, Purple Man! One question first. Where did you get that apple?
Page 21, Panel 3: Luke Cage really wants that apple.
Verdict: What? It’s over? Figures a book that didn’t properly start wouldn’t properly end. It was okay, but it was too dark, like, coloring-wise. I can barely tell what’s going on, and I hate how each villain sounds exactly the same, and also that I don’t recognize half of them. And that flub on page 19 is just a bit unacceptable. This is not a very good starting story.
No comments:
Post a Comment