Chaos;Head - Episode 2: “Ego”

I always forget what part the ego plays in everything. I mean, the id is the party dude, and the superego is your discerning grandma, but the ego is, what, the dude who suggested that maybe you should go to class today? Eh, whatever, I’m already on record this week that Freud is stupid.

LAST TIME: A creeper who lives in a storage container witnesses a murder (maybe) and then meets a nerd girl (probably) and then finds out the murderer is in his class (I guess). From all the clues we are getting that our main character is completely fucking insane, I’m not sure how important I should take any given plot point. Also, you have to intentionally turn on the English dub!

Infinity Inc. - Issue 2: “Luthor’s Monsters, Part 2”

Really now? Kid Empty? Why not just name him Baby Bad Guy? Also, Superman is coming to the rescue hurray.

LAST TIME: Everyone who participated in Luthor’s weird superhero program during 52 is now damaged as fuck, and going to therapy. They appear to be randomly manifesting superpowers, and one of them is going fucking crazy, and Steel’s niece apparently turned to fog. That’s pretty bad.

Touch - Episode 2: “1 + 3 = 3”

Certifiably untrue. You’d think that a show that purports to be about numbers would not make such a easy mistake so early on. And isn’t the common wrong math problem 2 + 2 = 5?

LAST TIME: Kiefer Sutherland is the father of an autistic kid that he maybe needs to some help raising, since the kid is constantly freaking out. Through a bunch of insane coincidences, they manage to save a school bus full of children by distracting this guy. Also we follow a lost phone that manages to trek the entire world in what seems like a week, eventually being used as a detonator for a suicide bomber, but everything turns out okay. I’m not sure how they were related at all.

Chaos;Head - Episode 1: "Boot Up"

That’s not how a semicolon works, Japan. I’d consider this a momentary lapse if there wasn’t ANOTHER show called “Robotics;Notes.” You guys really have no idea what you are doing.

NETFLIX SYNOPSIS:  After being told about a string of killings in his area, high school student Takumi stumbles on a murder scene. Convinced the police are after him, Takumi spirals into paranoid delusions that blur the lines between reality and fiction.

Who told him about these murders? Would he have not stumbled onto the scene if he wasn’t told? Also, that’s not him in the cover art, is it? If you are only going to show up the ladies, why are these series never about the ladies?

Infinity Inc. - Issue 1: Luthor’s Monsters, Part 1

I really liked 52, the DC megaseries in 2006 that explained what happened in the year that followed the Infinite Crisis when Superman, Batman, and Wonder Woman just took a break for some reason. Mainly because it launched my favorite character into the role of the Most Important Person in the Multiverse, but also because pretty much every plot thread was solid and interesting and it managed to resolve all of them in a great way, while given a lot of attention to a bunch of characters who nobody ever talks about, like the Metal Men and Ralph Dibny (RIP).

In fact, the only plot that I only cared about because Steel was tangentially involved was….this one. Lex Luthor gave a bunch of assholes superpowers and apparently bought the rights to a superhero team name (?) and then a bunch of bullshit happened that eventually ended with Steel just committing breaking and entering to stop Lex Luthor’s plans, whatever those were. Whatever, at least Steel looked good. Let’s find out what happened in this miniseries.

Touch - Episode 1:"Tales of the Red Thread"

AND WE’RE BACK. So anyway, Kiefer Sutherland has a son, who can tell the future, but nobody knows or something? And it’s called Touch? Anyway, overly dramatic, mildly supernatural, this is how we do. We did. And we again!